You have a voice, so what are you going to do with it?

When tragedy hits, people band together, but when times are uneventful, people gossip, backstab, and hate.  It happens in the workplace, families, and, of course, the blogging community.  I often feel discouraged and disappointed from it all, and often wonder why we indulge in tearing others down?

The blogging world is extremely susceptible to this destruction because we are always voicing our opinions.  While some tough issues do end up in healthy debates, others result in nasty Twitter hashtags and defaming posts, which end up worse off than the original issue.  I cannot figure out the logic or reason for these actions.  Boredom, perhaps?

As many of you know, I experienced a taste of Twitter bullying and hate when I attended the Nestle event in September.  I was judged for simply being at the event.  I was bullied before any discussion took place with the Nestle USA CEO, heck, before I had even unpacked my bags.  I was called a “drone” and the all popular “shill” for attending such an event.  There were obviously more civilized ways to debate and discuss the issues that were at hand, but nonetheless, bullying flooded the twitter streams.  Yay, name calling!

I was thrilled when the LA Times contacted me about a “Twitter terrorism” piece a few weeks ago, because I REALLY felt that it needed to be discussed.  So many of the cyber bullying rules apply to minors, but where does that leave us adults?  Obviously, we can handle our emotions better than children, but isn’t it still wrong, hurtful, and dangerous?  So, why do we do it, and why didn’t the LA Times use the opportunity to raise awareness on a national level?

I can’t remember where I heard this quote, but I’ve always liked it:

“Hurting people hurt people.”

This is the only way I can slightly understand why a person would engage in such behavior.

The same goes with gossip.  We are all guilty of it to some degree, but there is a line that, when crossed, becomes destructive.  I suppose it all stems from jealously and insecurity, but, geez, aren’t we adults?  I have been beyond amazed at the gossip that goes on in the mom blogging community, and baffled at the things I have heard and read.  By the way, most gossip I hear is so far from the truth, that it is comical.  That is why it is so dangerous.  Get the truth from the horse’s mouth.  Form opinions from your own experiences, even if so-called leaders in your community tell you otherwise.

So, how do we change these habits?We have the power to come together, agree to disagree on issues, and lift each other up.  Take fellow blogger, Anissa Mayhew.  When we all first learned of her stroke, we quickly came together and asked, “What can we do to help?”  It felt strong, like an army.  Why not ALWAYS be an army then?  We can still love, support, and encourage one other, regardless of our differences.  Isn’t this what we teach our children?  The mom blogging community has enough naysayers to deal with, the last thing we need to do is turn on each other.  If our fellow bloggers or friends go down the wrong road, try helping them.  If they choose to engage in destructive behavior, they will deal with their own consequences, so you need not rub it in their faces.

Try to inspire.  Try to lift up.  To to help.  You have a voice.  What are you going to do with it?

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Amy Bellgardt

AMY BELLGARDT is a wife and mom of two boys, as well as founder and lead blogger at Mom Spark. Amy also manages Mom Spark Media, a social media marketing firm.

63 Responses to “You have a voice, so what are you going to do with it?”

  1. #
    Jessica @ Riding with Jessica — November 29, 2009 at 8:57 pm

    Well said.

    [Reply]

  2. #
    Toni — November 29, 2009 at 8:58 pm

    Great post amy. I think cyber bullying is not okay. If I see it on a blog I will report it to sponsors absolutely. I am about ready to boycott twitter b/c of the ridiculousness going on. I did once upon a time long ago have a moment of public bashing an individual but I learned and grew up (thank you Jesus)

    I will never ever bash someone, posts I think are bordering on cyber bullying i will report. I wont’ harass others but rather use my anger or whatever to do something positive, fuel is fuel no matter what inspired it yes, so why not use that fuel to do something worthwhile. No one is worth my time to bash, harass or threaten

    Having integrity is a big part of backing down or handing a situation in a classy way..some have it and some don’t. I learned real quick it is much better to have integrity and ethics in the end it’s what pays off!

    [Reply]

  3. #
    Lindsey — November 29, 2009 at 9:02 pm

    I’ve had a problem online before, and I’m sure if the problem person came back, He’d do it all over again. One of my kids get picked on a lot too.

    It’s not right and I was/am doing something about it

    [Reply]

  4. #
    Meg — November 29, 2009 at 9:07 pm

    What am I going to do with my voice? I am going to share stories that make me laugh, vent about things that make me cry and RT anything that is worth sharing… posts like this deserve an RT.
    I agree Amy with your last sentence and the quote about hurting people. There is a way to state your opinion with out being negative. I think we all need to strive to find that balance.

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — November 29th, 2009 @ 9:36 pm

      That’s right, Meg, finding the balance is the answer, really.

      [Reply]

  5. #
    Hanna Horner — November 29, 2009 at 9:21 pm

    That’s the beauty and danger of cyberspace – we all have opinions, and no “in person” relationships to nurture.

    I just wish people would take it upon themselves to “Be the Change they wish to see in the world.” like the wise Gandhi said..
    I try to – online and off (and OFF line is my challenge)…

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — November 30th, 2009 @ 9:41 am

      Do you know what is sad? Many of us HAVE met IRL, and it still happens. :(

      [Reply]

  6. #
    Donna — November 29, 2009 at 9:46 pm

    Yeah, you are great!! Way to stand against this junk…seriously, I don’t have time for it.

    [Reply]

  7. #
    Steph. — November 29, 2009 at 10:00 pm

    Great points, Amy! And, a post that needed to be written. Here! Here!

    [Reply]

  8. #
    Allison — November 29, 2009 at 10:05 pm

    so true, so true about the blogging community.

    I posted about Anissa too and a few of us Cleveland bloggers are banding together to raise money for her family. I hope we can all help a little bit this holiday season.

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — November 30th, 2009 @ 9:41 am

      That is fabulous Allison!

      [Reply]

  9. #
    Christy — November 29, 2009 at 10:08 pm

    Good post! I’ve often said that mom bloggers (all bloggers, really) should use our powers for good. I try to avoid the negativity and avoid those who feel the need to spread it, even those who think they’re doing it for a good cause (the Nestle event being a prime example).

    [Reply]

  10. #
    Melanie B — November 29, 2009 at 11:45 pm

    It most definitely IS ridiculous! And, I thought it was interesting that you assumed adults can handle their emotions better than children. The cyber bullying and asinine stuff I see on Twitter make me laugh. These are clearly children in adult “suits”. The sad part is that these “adults” are parents

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — November 30th, 2009 @ 9:42 am

      Melanie- You are so right, they obviously can’t handle their emotions better than children. Good point!

      [Reply]

  11. #
    Michelle (The BearTwinsMom) — November 29, 2009 at 11:47 pm

    Another phrase I remember from a teacher- when you point the finger at someone, three are pointing back at you.

    Excellent post, Amy. I agree with you on so many levels. I’m glad you shared this.

    Warm regards,
    Michelle aka The “BearTwinsMom”

    [Reply]

  12. #
    Duong Sheahan — November 30, 2009 at 12:07 am

    Amy,
    Great post. We are given a choice daily to be either a part of the problem, or help solve the problem.

    Having a healthy discussion is great…but when it gets nasty and ugly and tears another person down then it’s just WRONG.

    In the digital world, comments can become permanent on the internet and these comments can be very damaging.

    I hope this community can work on becoming better allies than enemies and I know there are several who aim to do so. It’s so great to see and experience.

    Thanks for sharing your post!

    [Reply]

  13. #
    Amanda — November 30, 2009 at 12:44 am

    Great post Amy! I couldn’t have said it better.

    [Reply]

  14. #
    Kim @ Beautiful Wreck — November 30, 2009 at 12:45 am

    This was an excellent read. I am clueless to a lot of the drama that goes on but I have had problems online. I try to move on from them and learn from my mistakes (and others).

    [Reply]

  15. #
    Jennifer — November 30, 2009 at 9:49 am

    Very Well said! I see the drama but try to not get involved. I think jumping into something people have no clue on how it originated can make it so much worse.

    [Reply]

  16. #
    Monica — November 30, 2009 at 9:51 am

    Wonderful Post! We do have the power to help, and when you think about the fact that we all rally together. Even when we may not know these people IRL, then we have amazing power, cause we are willing to help and make the world better. That truly inspires me. Those are the kinds of things I want my children to learn from. I hope that people we continue to learn from the amazing things we do online.

    [Reply]

  17. #
    niri — November 30, 2009 at 12:12 pm

    As much as you try to ignore it, it pervades the blogosphere. It is the reason I try to just focus on working on the blog to stay out of all this nonsense. I have heard some pretty ugly words used, even from those who pretend otherwise.

    For those who jump on the bandwagon trumpeting the horn of all this mockery and silliness, remember that tomorrow you may be the victim or scapegoat. People have just too much time on their hands to do this crap.

    [Reply]

    • Del replied: — November 30th, 2009 @ 7:06 pm

      Best reply…not biased in anyway.

      [Reply]

  18. #
    CJ — November 30, 2009 at 1:32 pm

    As I said, I couldn’t wait to read this blog post when I got to work! You are very right. The time we take in tearing one another down, pointing the finger and finding ways to be “right” is wasted time. We don’t always have to agree, but where is the mutual respect we deserve as fellow human beings?

    Even with the wonderful project I run, I still get people trying to tear it (and me) down, which is ridiculous. People need to focus their attention and energy on something more productive and positive. Bravo.

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — November 30th, 2009 @ 6:37 pm

      Some people don’t like to see others do well. Plain and simple. Don’t get it. Don’t understand it. It is what it is. :(

      [Reply]

  19. #
    Amy — November 30, 2009 at 2:44 pm

    I’m a business owner who has a lot of relationships with “mom blogs” and I have to say it is a real turn off. I would rather not advertise or sponsor/pay for giveaways on a blog where there is a lot of that taking place. I don’t want my name associated with backstabbing, and slander in such public forums. It is really sad because there are so many talented amazing women out there I hope we can all focus on the positive not things that bring others down.

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — November 30th, 2009 @ 3:27 pm

      This is a whole other issue I want to write about. I fear what sponsors and businesses think of us when they see behavior like this. Sad.

      [Reply]

  20. #
    Gilz — November 30, 2009 at 2:59 pm

    There is always going to be someone hatin’ on you in Bloggville or Twitterville. You can’t please everyone but when someone hones in on a specific someone to tear them down, its just sad.

    I can ignore and move on but not everyone has that ability.

    CyberBullys are Cowards.

    [Reply]

  21. #
    Run DMT — November 30, 2009 at 3:16 pm

    Very well said!

    I can never understand how grown-ups allow their own insecurities, jealousy and pettiness to get in the way of appreciating another’s success. We teach our children to applaud other’s successes and yet, we do the complete opposite when it comes to recognizing other adults. The hypocrisy grates me and therefore, I choose not to get involved with the negativity.

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — November 30th, 2009 @ 3:26 pm

      Yes, isn’t it funny how we sometimes don’t practice what we preach?

      [Reply]

  22. #
    Del — November 30, 2009 at 6:30 pm

    I want to chime in since I feel I know someone who has been picked on by bullies.

    You can read it here. http://www.delthedad.com

    Trust me I am upset with all the crap too, since I wasted the last 2 days, just to have people try and make me out as a problem. I should have asked the “bigger” bloggers if I could post or tweet what I want, maybe next time, just so I don’t have to see people trying to start drama out of a real issue.

    My question then to you all, is it OK for 1 group to pick on 1 person cause they have more people at the moment? And if that 1 person catches wind of this, do they have a right to stand up and expose the lies that others have tried to make? Put yourself in those shoes before you answer it.

    I understand starting problems is not cool. I feel starting problems are just those when you have no proof or facts to back your accusations. I will only argue with or about something if I have the facts and proof. Otherwise if I am wrong, I am the ass, and I am a self conscious person. If I am wrong, I do admit it, otherwise I feel like an ass and hard-headed person.

    I know SOME people have made me into being the bully, but I started my blog AFTER someone I knew had been picked on for long enough time.

    Maybe some people need to realize that when people are backed into a corner, they have to defend themselves.

    And all the problems that this post was created about, has turned the attention away from the issue that some are mean to others, and now the focus is on why did anyone even get involved? I don’t know, but I think when people see the facts and not just someone’s posts saying their side, people tend to think for themselves. But that is probably my crazy thinking again. According to some I am a sorry little man and this and that.

    It’s sad that people keep saying people are feeding into this problem. But people saw a problem and did not accept it.

    It’s like the people who created r-word.org, they were fed up with society acting in a negative way and said something.

    Hopefully you allow my post, so I can say my thoughts. I know I am new and I have like 750 twitter followers and my traffic is not in the 1,000’s, but I am a person and I have the right to defend myself.

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — November 30th, 2009 @ 6:36 pm

      I think everyone has the right to defend themselves, as long as it’s done with class and maturity. Like I said, if someone indulges in ugly behavior they will deal with their own consequences, we don’t need to do it for them. Not sure if that is relevant to your problem or if I answered your question, but thanks for commenting.

      [Reply]

      • Del replied: — November 30th, 2009 @ 6:49 pm

        I know, but the net is too easy to hide the facts or cover them up, and a lot of people do not understand that. People can keep their people away from others, and spread all the filth they want. And like we all know, rumors can get out of hand when their are NO FACTS OR PROOF, but just people saying what they want others to hear.

        Its unfair when people can post mean things about people they don’t know, but someone who has been in a way ‘tormented,’ cannot even state their side? This is not directed at you, but what happened to the other side? I just dont see people accepting that anymore, especially in this blogospehere. Its about well your a nobody or your not in my group, so you must remain silent. Not cool.

        Anyone has the right to do as they please, but when people try to paint themselves as one thing to get ahead, then after they are ahead, they show their true self as one who is not faithful to what they painted themselves out as to begin with. Its like defrauding the public, and I dont accept it. Many join the police force to be a good cop and protect their community, and not to take advantage of their position to do illegal bidding and let crime persist. Peace

  23. #
    Del — November 30, 2009 at 6:41 pm

    And again, some people out there are making me out to be a trouble maker saying I will use my blog to extort people? I have only had a problem with 2 people on here and no one else. Those 2 now painted me out to be this and that, with no PROOF, but just they can vouch for it themselves (I have never met them or even directly talked to them.) Now others have a problem with me on here because they are friends with the other side, regardless of the facts.

    Oh well, I guess people need to keep their mouths shut, if they are not too big in the blogosphere. And we are all different and many of us are from different walks of life, and hopefully some on here can respect this and not just let their beliefs cloud their judgment.

    Thanks and sorry for all this, but I was not the only one fed up, and like others said, there is more than just 1 side to the story.

    I will not comment any more and not feed into people trying to instigate problems with me to make me out as a bad guy. I am the kind of person who doesn’t respect rudeness from ANYONE, so I have a hard time backing down sometimes. I just hope people out there will not talk crap about me or my wife behind out backs. Say it in the open, I have.

    [Reply]

    • Anonymous replied: — December 1st, 2009 @ 1:07 am

      I don’t know you, but it seems as though you cannot let an issue die. You devote post after post to hashing over the details. I don’t get it. Amy’s post is about not bashing and belittling people online. I clicked on your name and went to a post, which was full of quotes, screenshots, and “he said/she said” stating the same issues over and over again.

      Have you thought about how you will let this issue go? It’s not healthy to hold a grudge. Sometimes talking to a neutral party can help you get past the issue that is troublesome to you.

      [Reply]

  24. #
    jennyonthespot — November 30, 2009 at 10:50 pm

    Well… I agree, my dear. It’s all just nuts. If any interaction is made with intent to point & shame and not work toward creating better, then good things will not grow.

    I am currently dealing with an issue outside of this sphere, but the problem is the same. Even when sides have different perspectives, I believe there are healthy ways to work things out… The problem is some folks just want to be right… not good or kind or actually solve the issue.

    I applaud you. and also adore you :)

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — December 1st, 2009 @ 12:05 pm

      Yes, the drama lies in all genres of life. We can only control how WE react. I adore you, too, girl!

      [Reply]

  25. #
    Scatteredmom — November 30, 2009 at 11:58 pm

    I wrote and published a post called, “I Believe” where I stated exactly where I stand on this stuff. I did it to remind myself when I lose sight, and for my readers to keep me honest.

    Sometimes I’ve spoken up and given an opinion, but I refuse to stoop to name calling or nastiness. In some cases I have stopped following people or reading their blogs because of their behavior or posts that I have felt are WAY over the line.

    Really, the only person I can control is me, so that’s what I focus on.

    [Reply]

  26. #
    Mariah — December 1, 2009 at 12:07 am

    It’s too bad highschool has to follow us into adulthood! I have been lucky in finding great blogs and people to connect with on twitter. It can go downhill with one bad egg though. Great post.

    [Reply]

  27. #
    1stopmom — December 1, 2009 at 12:09 am

    Great post Amy. Simple and to the point.I definitely remember all of what happened during the Nestle event. I was caught off guard by a lot of tweets and posts. Luckily I was there with a wonderful group *hugs* I am still learning “how” to use my voice but I do do know that with my voice I want to be positive and encouraging.

    [Reply]

  28. #
    Amy — December 1, 2009 at 12:19 am

    Well said, Amy. I chalk it up to mob mentality. Thanks for being a positive voice!

    [Reply]

  29. #
    Miranda @ Keeper of the Cheerios — December 1, 2009 at 12:54 am

    Great post! Very well written. I like where you said,”Get the truth from the horse’s mouth. Form opinions from your own experiences, even if so-called leaders in your community tell you otherwise.” That is something that is SO important to remember. Never go by what someone is saying and certainly don’t let what people are saying form your opinions or sway how you feel about another blogger. You never know, that person could end up being one of your best friends when you’ve finally learned to think for yourself.

    I like to avoid drama… for my readers and for my own sanity. I don’t put up with it at all. Sure, I have my opinions but I wouldn’t say something online that I wouldn’t say to someone’s face. It’s often hard to remember that there are REAL people reading the words we write online and if we’re going to be truly influential as mom bloggers we have to be caring and sensitive to others and their feelings and we always have to remember that people are watching what we say and do.

    Some people just thrive on drama. It’s what keeps them going and they don’t care who they hurt in the process. I think one day their actions and their words will come back to bite them in the butt.

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — December 1st, 2009 @ 12:09 pm

      Thank you, Miranda. I threw in the part you quoted because I have been given false information & recommendations that I did not agree with once I met the person. Another issue that I didn’t even bring up is making assumptions. A HUGE problem in our community.

      [Reply]

  30. #
    Susan (5 Minutes for Mom) — December 1, 2009 at 1:13 am

    This is what Janice and I are ALL about… building each other up and never tearing down.

    We NEVER participate in cyber bullying at any level.

    I always think first about what I would tell my daughter to do and if she would be proud of me for my actions.

    And it all comes down to the good old “Do unto others…”

    Rants do bring traffic and it can be nice to voice your opinion with a lot of flare, but if someone is getting hurt on the other end… it’s just not right.

    Thanks for bringing this up. We all need to keep reminding each other that we are a strong community that grows stronger by building each other up.

    And yes, let’s keep doing more for Anissa and show the world what our community is really about.

    [Reply]

    • Traci replied: — December 1st, 2009 @ 1:48 am

      Amy you all are a brave group! I think anytime you put yourself out there for all to read you open your self up to haters and people who are not going to agree or be nice. You can’t please all the people all the time. Hopefully though those people are in the minority of the blogger world.
      I am new to reading blogs, been a long time friend of Anissa’s but never really got into the blog side of things. When I saw what my friend had been doing with the blogging, I gotta say I was utterly impressed and blown away.
      I witnessed first hand the amazing coming together of people and how quickly things spread through out the community!
      Wow, what a mighty force, glad to see it being used for good; the stuff I read anyhow :)
      And I ‘m glad I stumbled upon you today, it’s been a blessing :)

      [Reply]

      • Amy Bellgardt replied: — December 1st, 2009 @ 12:06 pm

        Traci- I’m so glad you found me, too! You have seen first hand the power of bloggers and how we CAN do good for those in need. :)

  31. #
    Joellen Raderstorf — December 1, 2009 at 3:00 pm

    Amen Mama!
    In the words of Julia Ward Howe, we need to find what unites us rather than what divides. Even in the case of #Nestle, everyone could learn from each other. Time for the mommy wars to end and mommies to recognize the power we have when we come together. I still keep thinking that if all the moms who engaged in the Nestle discussion came together to request a Fair Trade Butterfinger from Nestle, it would happen. What do we want to accomplish together mamas, this is our time, our stage, our voice. Way to go Amy!

    [Reply]

  32. #
    Hollee Temple — December 1, 2009 at 3:27 pm

    Great points, Amy! When I first saw this cyberbullying (and I am relatively new to blogging), all I could think about were the “mean girls” in high school. Some of these “bullies” I think are building a persona, and sadly, a following, by engaging in this sort of thing. I don’t know about you, but I’m glad to have high school behind me, and I’m glad that most of the bloggers out there seem to be genuinely supportive and cool. I sort of analogize it with the student evaluations I receive: I try to look for trends, and I don’t spend a lot of time focusing on the one or two “bad apples” who might otherwise spoil the experience for me. Be who you are and don’t look back!

    [Reply]

  33. #
    Jael Custom Designs — December 1, 2009 at 4:20 pm

    You’ve got a standing ovation from me! You’ve covered all key points. Imagine how a new mom blogger coming into the community may feel. I’m sure it can be a bit intimidating. My blog is both personal and professional and I am usually talking about a personal experience, giving resource information on running a small business, or promoting my business.

    I feature other mom bloggers and it’s all positive. I always use twitter to draw people back to my blog or art studio. I may engage in persoal conversations but not to tear down another blogger or gossip. I truly hope this message gets to every blogger in the blogosphere. I treat others the way I want to be treated, it goes a long way!

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — December 1st, 2009 @ 7:18 pm

      Kudos to you for staying positive!

      [Reply]

  34. #
    Del — December 1, 2009 at 4:37 pm

    I am sorry to all who thinks I am the biggest POS in the world. Trust me I wanted all this to stop a long time ago. I did not just make a blog and create the posts I have done because I had nothing to do. I am very busy with work, college, and 2 kids. You know how many times Kristin has been saddened to hear people making up rumors and lies about her to people she knows and then them coming back to her. Well I do, and it’s too many to exactly remember. If this was your spouse going through this, you would not be too happy. Just like many have said “if it is was my kid, it would be a whole different story” Sad thing is no one should stand up to this kind of crap only if it’s their own kid. What about all the other parents out there. Next, people will say if it was my friend’s kid or a relative who is a kid. It’s not about that anymore; it’s about treating anyone who you don’t know with a little dignity.

    I made a post in response to a libel post directed at me, what if it was you? Would you just let it go around and let people make a decision off a 1 sided post? I am not telling anyone to take sides. All I have ever asked “is it is fair for one person to pick on someone and for that someone to not be able to defend themselves?” Just remember all this next time something like this comes up. I can’t really find anything on cyber bullies in the blogosphere so hopefully I and all the others have helped to bring a little awareness, even if people want to paint me out as a drama maker, trouble maker. That is what the people who started this want, because they hope it will reflect on Kristin. Then they will use it against her. So no matter what the facts are, she and I are wrong in certain circles. Its fine, but the net is not the place to talk trash. It’s not fair and I am sure everyone can agree on it.

    Again, I have never written a post to attack. Every post I have ever made was in response to an event to something that happened. I don’t like to fill my blog with that crap, but that is the only way to state my side. I am moderated in chats because I just want people to hear the other side. Shame on me and anyone who stands up for what is right.

    This is going to be a good lesson for new comers. Don’t say anything unless you have an online following and influence. So much for everyone having a voice.

    If the parties involved could work together and not be mean and against each other, they could have all gotten real far. Just remember, 1 side did not want to play with the other.

    I am sick of people trying to make me out to be someone I am completely not. If you want to ask some people who met me in real life, look up those who attended the D3 publisher trip recently in SoCal. People there saw me and met me in person. One even said your not that bad as they make you out online. But like many say, I dont spend time with my kids and I may live in my parents basement. Oh well, the best judges of my character or a bunch of women who hate Kristin, and have never met me. Right on, I am glad many of you see it that way. You should learn not to judge someone off of what other say, especially when those others despise and will do whatever to push them out.

    Again, sorry and I will try and stay away. I just like good conversation on real and important topics.

    [Reply]

    • Amy Bellgardt replied: — December 1st, 2009 @ 7:17 pm

      Del-I’m sorry you’re having problems. I do not know about your situation, I’m just generalizing these issues. Hope you work out your problems in a civil manner.

      [Reply]

  35. #
    Diane — December 1, 2009 at 5:14 pm

    Great post! And while I am very new to all of this, I have already felt what you are mentioning. It is discouraging to see this happening. But what a great post and reminder to keep addressing the issue and letting others know it’s not okay.

    [Reply]

  36. #
    Allison G. — December 1, 2009 at 7:47 pm

    I was one of those kids targeted everyday at school. I was bullied for just taking up space in the world, or during that time the classroom. I always wondered what a person thinks when they decide, “hey this person deserves to be dragged through the mud. As an adult I have learned to kick the bullies out of my life. I dealt with dark days as a child and don’t want to waste my time with it as an adult. I am amazed at the imaturity in adults and why they feel the need to make themselves feel better by hurting another verbally in the blogging world!

    [Reply]

  37. #
    Moomettesgram — December 5, 2009 at 9:54 am

    Excellent Amy! My voice in the blogosphere has always been positive. I try to help people with & share the knowledge that I’ve acquired throughout my years!

    [Reply]

  38. #
    Luv2CUSmile — December 22, 2009 at 3:07 pm

    It is so sad to hear of bullying at all. Especially when it’s between grown adults. Does it make them feel stronger to tear someone else down? How sad. We are becoming a society of “survival of the fittest” rather than a society of “do unto others” – It is scary to know our children will have to be stronger than we were just to endure and succeed in this society. Teaching our kids the right way to live and be, but knowing if they don’t “look out for number one” that no one else will. I don’t want my kids to lose their values because they have to trample the other guy to get ahead in life.
    I will use my voice to encourage, lift up, and defend!
    Great post! (Also sad to hear you experienced this first hand)

    [Reply]

  39. #
    Jen — February 6, 2010 at 7:16 pm

    I recently found out that people’s site I had been supporting where bashing me not knowing it was me because it was a different screen name. Boy were they in for a shock. I for one am really tired if the bashing on Twitter. It makes me really sad for the world. I wrote a post about my experience on my blog. My offense? I like a tv show.

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  40. #
    TheConsumerQueen — February 6, 2010 at 11:46 pm

    I am so glad you posted this! This has been bothering me for a long time. It’s not just cyber bulling it’s the bullying I see behind the scenes too. Top mom bloggers in the community giving great advice, telling every how not to be etc but then you meet them behind the scenes and they are being completly opposite right in front of you. Bashing other bloggers that have never done a thing to them. It breaks my heart. Instead of using our energy and time to make fun of and put down other bloggers we should be using our resources to help each other and lift each other up. It’s like we are back in highschool again.

    I will use my voice to encourage and uplift. I will use my voice to stand up for others. I will use my voice to support other bloggers. I will use my voice to be myself and not something different behind closed doors!

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  41. #
    GeorgiaMist — February 7, 2010 at 6:27 pm

    I’m a Southerner of Scots-Irish descent. I’m going to speak my mind and give my opinion and I’m going to be honest without being unkind (I hope).
    Those who hide behind the cyber-wall to call names, harass, and bully are not worthy of your time or mine.

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  42. #
    Joe @ 20 to Life — February 8, 2010 at 12:24 am

    I love that you posted about this. Luckily I’m a novice blogger, so I’ve thus far remained undetected as far as someone deciding to “bully” me, but it’s awful reading about others being treated that way with horrid hashtags & other childish ways of being mean. It’s like we’re back in the 5th grade and the “popular girl” has decided you’re marked for no other reason than you looked at her the wrong way! Good grief, and no thanks. I’d rather stay away from it all :)

    So great post – and I’ve left something for you on my blog,
    http://twentytolifeblog.blogspot.com/2010/02/brand-new-blog-awesome-awards.html
    you’re free to take it or not, but I love your blog, so I gave you one :)
    Thanks for a really great post, I mean that.
    Joe

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  43. #
    Home Office Mommy — February 16, 2010 at 7:00 pm

    Hello Amy,

    So glad to have found you here! I’ve seen it online too and appreciate you tackling the issue head on!

    Believe well!

    Adelaide Zindler
    HomeOfficeMommy.com

    [Reply]

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